Learning from the Past to have Courage for the Future

This is a painting by John Clare from the series of paintings
 known as Saints at Devil's Gate

Learning from the Past to have Courage for the Future

            Sometime last December the idea to teach English abroad hit me.  I’ve thought about it before, but it never seemed like there was time for it.  This time, the idea seemed just as ludicrous, but it wouldn’t leave me.  I mean, I have two jobs and while neither of them are amazing, both of them at least offer experience and have potential to turn into something else.  Teaching abroad means quitting both jobs, putting off grad school, and basically taking a risk.  But the idea persisted and finally, I started giving it real consideration.

That’s when I got this feeling, a feeling that I’m starting to get to know pretty well. It’s the exact same feeling I got when I decided to go on a mission.  It’s also the same feeling I got when I decided to go to India, which was one of the most life changing decisions I’ve ever made.  In fact, every huge, life changing decision I’ve made has almost always been accompanied by this feeling.  It’s my own personal fire of the spirit.

            But the truth is, I’m terrified to do this.

            Which might be why Pioneer Day actually means something to me this year.  I don’t think it would be right for me to compare myself to pioneers, but I’ve been reading some journal entries and I’ve found them to be such a great source of comfort, that I thought I’d share a few of them and the lessons they’ve taught me in courage.

      1.  Shoot for a goal out of reach and never know when to quit because that’s when the impossible becomes possible.  “Yesterday we travelled over the most intolerable roads! It was a query in my mind how the first company, going as they did early in the spring, ever forced their way through so much mud! I was led to exclaim, what is there in all the world, the Mormons will not attempt to do?”  Louisa Barnes Pratt Age 43, June 1846, exodus across Iowa.

        2.  It’s okay that other people might think you’re insane, that’s just another word for the mentally creative. “Drove about 3 miles & came to a house the last one on our route. We thus leave the abodes of civilization to go forth as wanderers on the Earth without homes not knowing on what part of the continent we might be permitted to stop . . . I have often laughed at an observation made to me by a settler with whom I chanced to meet one day on the prairie. His inquiry was what part are you expecting to locate in. I answered in all sincerity, I really do not know sir. His reply was, When I leave with my family not knowing where I expect to stop, any person is at liberty to call me a damned fool.” Lorenzo Brown Age 23, May 28, 1846, exodus across Iowa.

      3.  The best way to live life is with curiosity and a dash of humor. “ In the course of my walk I saw a large buffalo which had been to the river for drink. He was just rising the bank as I came in sight of him. It appeared that his curiosity was as much aroused as mine. He gazed at me for a moment, as I did at him. Then shaking his head and switching his tail, [he] started toward me in great haste, but as there were several deep gulfs between us I was not much afraid of his reaching before I could gain the wagons, however I concluded it was best for me to be leaving. . . .” Caroline Barnes Crosby Age 41, August 1848, Willard Richards company. Trail journal.

        4.  We all have our moments, so we need to be patient with each other and with ourselves.  These two quotes are from the same woman, Hannah Tapfield King. “We have had the Platte River by us for the past week. It is very pretty—full of little islands— Oh! I can write no more. The mosquitoes drive me mad!” and “A long day’s travel! This day these sublime bluffs in view all day!— They plainly speak a designer— tho’ ages must have rolled along since that design was carried out. “ The Bluff ruins . . . are very beautiful— I should like to have an explanation about them—but I suppose none know their history— They stand out in bold relief with a silent eloquence that speaks trumpet-tongued to every thinking mind— There they are looking eternally silent.” Hannah Tapfield King Age 46, English convert, August 3 and 5, 1853, Claudius V. Spencer company.

        5. Nature can offer relief from our predicaments. “ Our minds were so much delighted with the novelty of the surrounding scenery that we almost forgot we were a little past the meridian of life, and for a moment imagined ourselves mere children, sporting at leisure. All the animal we saw was one little rabbit which ran from us in great fear and a few very pretty birds that seemed [to] make homes in the old cedar trees.” Caroline Barnes Crosby Age 41, August 11, 1848, Willard Richards company. Trail journal.

Took this picture at Arches a couple months ago...I love Utah's landscape

        6.  Almost every huge change that has happened, is because someone asked questions. I think the future belongs to those who are curious.  “Yesterday we travelled till quite late & passed some splendid bluffs ruins. These bluffs are something I cannot describe. They are sublime & mysterious— There is beauty & order in them, and it requires no very fanciful stretch of imagination to form baronial buildings—‘Keeps’—gateways. . . . They are very high— I should like to hear a philosophical description of them— They please and interest me more than [I] have language to express— There is much design in them—yet they say they are solely the work of Nature— Well I must leave them like all mysterious things.” Hannah Tapfield King Age 46, English convert, September 10, 1853, Claudius V. Spencer company.

        7.  Just do what you can.  We prize sacrifice so much that sometime we forget that to do our best is sacrifice enough.  Furthermore, don’t forget to notice the people around you.  There are hidden moments in each day that will tell a story of sacrifice and love.  “As we gazed down the yawning chasm that lay before us; the narrow road with rocks and bushes on each side, and leading, we could not see where, was a sight to make the strongest heart falter. My mother felt that she was not equal to the task of guiding her oxen down that fearful road, and my father tried to get a man to drive the team down for her. They were all fully occupied with their own teams, and she had to go down the best she could, hanging to the horns of her cattle, and leaving her dress as usual on the bushes to mark her way. I wonder if those coming after knew what those tattered rags meant.” Mary Jane Mount (Tanner) Age 10, autumn 1847, Abraham O. Smoot–George B. Wallace company.

        8.  We've done hard things before.  We know we can do hard things again. “As we enter the valley of the mountains and look out over the vast land of Zion, I am dismayed by the very immensity of the view. The boundless silence, and to see miles of sage brush everywhere. Behind us now are the heartaches and many thousands of silent tears that fell on the long unknown trail. I remember my dear home in England, of the flowers and trees and beautiful surroundings at that safe home. And I am home sick for my dear mother and father. But just as I have covered those endless hundreds of miles, so now I will begin work with renewed faith, begin the task of building a good home in this new wilderness.” Mary Pugh Scott Age 26, English convert, circa August 1848, Heber C. Kimball company.

*The quotes are courtesy of LDS Church History's Exhibit: "Saints at Devils Gate".  The online portion is accessible here:

https://history.lds.org/maps/museum/saints-at-devils-gate-online-exhibit